May we never forget...

I never understood people when they would say "I remember that moment exactly". People talk about being in a certain place, doing a certain thing when events such as the president being shot or a favorite celebrity dieing happens.

I now know. I will forever have Sept. 11 engrained in my mind. Forever in my memories.

I was 5 months pregnant. I had shuffled everyone out the door. Larry was heading to work after he dropped Josh off at school. Danny was on the bus already. I was getting ready for some peace and quiet. The phone rang and it was Larry asking me if I was watching the news. I turned the tv on and they were showing the smoke coming from the first tower. The newscast people on the Today show kept wondering what had happened. What could have possible gone wrong that this plane would accidently fly into a building.

Larry had said he was listening to the radio. One of the guys on the radio made the comment of "are we being attacked"? At this point no one knew anything. I kept watching in horror and despair thinking about the people in the building.

I sat there mesmorized to the tv. I prayed for the people in the planes and in the building. I wondered for a moment, why did I get pregnant, what kind of world would I be bringing this baby into?

Larry came home from work and we sat and watched tv all night. Not having much to say.

The next few days were eerie. We live under a flight path to a small airport. All planes had been grounded and it was so quiet. A noise we had gotten use to and complained about was gone.

I will also never forget because that is the reason Randy missed the first year of his daughters life. The reason so many prayers went out for him. The reason we know what the sacrifice of a soldier really is.

I will never forget.

http://www.september11victims.com/september11victims/victims_list.htm

Oscar 1971-2007

My first love.

The father of my son.

I can't post anything right now. I still feel such a great sense of loss. I feel heaviness in my heart everytime I see Danny.

I will add to this post at a later date.

Little Paul

Isn't he the cutest!!?

This is my nephews baby. He is a year old. Has the sweetest personality. I choose to not believe people when they tell me this angel has a temper. He looks exactly like his daddy. I choose to not believe that he acts like him too. Everyone loves on him all the time. I hear he is a little spoiled...but that's okay. That's why its good to be family and not the parents. You can give them back at the end of the day. haha

I miss not being back home to see him and baby Abby growing up. I feel mature (never old) knowing my kids are not the little kids anymore. I feel all grown up knowing my nephew is a father. I hope Paul knows how lucky he is. I hope he knows that being a dad will be tough, having a little one under foot is bothersome at times and knowing that this babys happiness is dependant on him is pressure. I want Paul to know this too shall pass. He won't be a baby for long. It sounds so cliche to say "they grow up real fast" but it's true. They really do. I use to clean your behind....

I feel blessed. More family equals more love. And there's always more than enough love to go around.

The little boy in the red shirt on the left is daddy. It's like looking at twins.

The boy in the tonka truck shirt. Some kid who had to jump in front of the camera. Haha. That's my brother Andy. That's a whole other story with embarrasing pictures for later.